Friday, October 30, 2009

Happy Birthday Sickie....oh sorry, I mean Sammy!! :)

My baby turns 9 years old today and is home with a hacking cold and a canker sore the size of Texas!
Happy Day, Sammy Dudes!!!!!!!!!!!




Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Busy weekend

Chris and I celebrated our 12th anniversary this weekend. No, it was not spent in a fancy restaurant, nor on a cruise ship. It was not spent in a luxurious hotel or spa. We spent our anniversary in the quaint city of North Adams but more specifically, in the er at North Adams regional Hospital. There was a man with a nail in his thumb, people coughing everywhere (swine flu mass hysteria) and our favorite little crack head, we'll call her beehive cause that is the only way I can desribe her hairdo. I have to say she did keep us entertained. But seriously, Christopher got hurt in a football game so as a precaution we took him in. He is fine and we have piece of mind. Although I probably could have saved us 3 hours cause when we walked out of the game, he wanted pizza. I don't think that people with head trauma usually ask for pizza on the way to the er......just saying.....

Friday, October 23, 2009

Friday Funny

A man is walking home alone late one foggy Halloween night, when behind him he hears:


BUMP...



BUMP...



BUMP...




Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.



BUMP...




BUMP...




BUMP...





Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him.




FASTER...



FASTER..




BUMP...




BUMP...




BUMP......



He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him. However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping.


clappity-BUMP...



clappity-BUMP....


clappity-BUMP...


on his heels, as the terrified man runs.



Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, he locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.



With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.









Bumping and clapping toward him.





The man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup! Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...


and,
















(hopefully you're ready for this!!!)











The coffin stops

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Friday Funny on Saturday!

A New Zealand farmer walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and
says, "Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache."

The wife, lying in the bed reading a book, looks up and says, "If you weren't such
an idiot, you'd know that's a sheep, not a cow."


The guy replies, "If you weren't such a presumptuous bitch, you'd realize I was
talking to the sheep."

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

My baby is growing up....

As Brad Paisley sings...." All I wanted was a car, sixteen of all of my dreams revolved around one thing,
All I wanted was a car


Saturday, October 10, 2009

Thought for the day

Above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you, because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.

—Roald Dahl

Friday, October 09, 2009

Friday Funny

A man is driving along a highway
and sees a rabbit jump out
across the middle of the road.
He swerves to avoid hitting it,
but unfortunately the rabbit
jumps right in front of the car.

The driver, a sensitive man
as well as an animal lover,
pulls over and gets out to see
what has become of the rabbit.

Much to his dismay,
the rabbit is dead.

The driver feels so awful
that he begins to cry.

A beautiful blonde woman
driving down the highway
sees a man crying on the
side of the road and pulls over.

She steps out of the car and
asks the man what's wrong.

"I feel terrible," he explains,
"I accidentally hit this rabbit
and killed it!"

The blonde says,
"Don't worry."

She runs to her car
and pulls out a spray can.

She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit,
bends down, and sprays the contents
onto the rabbit.

The rabbit jumps up, waves
its paw at the two of them
and hops off down the road.


Ten feet away the rabbit stops,
turns around and waves again,
he hops down the road another 10 feet,
turns and waves, hops another ten feet, turns and waves,
and repeats this again and again and again,
until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished.

He runs over to the woman and demands,
"What is in that can?
What did you spray on that rabbit?"

The woman turns the can around
so that the man can read the label.



It says...


(Are you ready for this?)







(Are you sure?)







(You know you're gonna be sorry)







(Last chance)







(OK, here it is)






It says,


"Hair Spray -
Restores life to dead hair,
and adds permanent wave."

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

UP & DOWN SEX

At a Senior Citizen's luncheon, an elderly
gentleman and an elderly lady
struck up a conversation and discovered that
they both loved to fish.

Since both of them were widowed,
they decided to go fishing together the next day.!

The gentleman picked the lady up, they rented a boat and headed to the
river to start out on their adventure.

They were riding down the river when there was a
fork in the river, and the gentleman asked the lady,

'Do you want to go up or down?'

All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt
and pants and made mad passionate love to the man
right there in the boat !

When they finished, the man couldn't believe
what had just happened, but he had just experienced the best sex
that he'd had in years.

They fished for a while and continued on down the
river, when soon they came upon another fork in the
river.

He again asked the lady, 'Up or down ?'

There she went again, stripped off her clothes,
and made wild passionate love to him again.

This really impressed the elderly gentleman, so
he asked her to go fishing again the next day.

She said yes and there they were the next day,
riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in
river! , and the elderly gentleman asked, 'Up or down ?'

The woman replied, 'Down.'

A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman
guided the boat down the river when he came upon
another fork in the river and he asked the
lady,'Up or down?'

She replied, 'Up.'

This really confused the gentleman so he asked,

'What's the deal? Yesterday, every time I asked
you if you wanted to go up or down you made mad
passionate love to me. Now today, nothing!'

She replied, 'Well, yesterday I wasn't wearing
my hearing aid and I thought the choices were
fuck or drown.'

Monday, October 05, 2009

A Moose on the Loose!!!!!


Chris and I looked out our kitchen window Friday and to our amazement, there was a MOOSE just standing there!! Maybe he wanted someone to play catch with....